Nicolás (2 likes)

Hello there! I really like the videogamey look your project has. I think this works great for the approach you took to tell the story, which are these shots with a character and some interaction with a prop. As for the story i think you are on the right way. Maybe adding more moments where the Parrots have a wider range of expression would help with the emotional arc of each.

Jacquelin

Thank you for your feedback.

Manuela (1 like)

Really liked the story, I feel that instead of writing the narrator, an actual dialogue would have made it stronger, and adding background drawings would have helped with immersing me in the story, overall good job!

Jacquelin

Thank you for your feedback.

Jackie

It would have been better to use dialog, instead of repetitive video game music. It was interesting when she plucked her feathers. I thought it would have tied in to her story of being perceived as beautiful. The sweaters & hoodies were cute. Not sure why sweaters are shameful.

Jacquelin

Thank you for your feedback.

Chad

I like this concept. I understand it is like an 8 bit design, but I wish there was more details or a background of some kind.

Jacquelin

Thank you for your feedback. With the way that this is being published which is straight to block chain the background being blank works better. This would be considered a series 1 of the project. Perhaps in future series it will have a more illustrated background. I would recommend checking out "Vee Friends" by Gary Vaynerchuk if you are interest in NFTs. He has already done a similar approach with raw drawings for a series 1and the most recent drops have very beautiful backgrounds. I am a storyteller and an artist for fun. I'm "ok" at drawing it's not my strength or major focus. Thank you for taking time to provide feedback.

Dani (1 like)

I have followed your story and the synopsis seems very good to me. I have also seen the drawings throughout the previous acts, but the style you have chosen at the end has misled me and perhaps there is too much text and not enough drawings. You may have time to include a few more. Go ahead!

Jacquelin

Thank you for your feedback. The drawings gave me a ton of anxiety and stress to get them done in such a short period of time. I have a disability and was hospitalized a week before this program started and I'm trying to take it easy while still completing it. This was extremely hard for me. I also work full time and run 4 businesses. The drawings didn't feel authentic for me when I was doing it. I had scrapped about 20 hand draw water colors before switching over to pixel art. This is the final cut and it's already had the art work on blockchain which is where it will stay. I appreciate your support and following through the creative development here. I felt very happy with the final project. The lack of support from everybody could be considered discouraging however I am extremely proud of this work and will leave it as is. Thank you so much for taking time to write back.

Jason (1 like)

hmm as a parrot owner myself I wonder if there's enough feathers for her to keep on plucking, lol. cute story, would think it would be good for kids. maybe more potential as a old fashioned paper book lol good luck with the NFT thing. As a deaf person I cannot give any feedback on the sound effects, wish those were accessible by closed captions as well.

Jacquelin

Thank you for mentioning that I will make note of it next time. I did not use any sound effects or narration by voice. I did have 2 songs I created. The first song is called "cafecito" it contains percussion sounds with conga and saxophone as well as a mallet type melody. The second song is called "opulence" it is a melody type song heavy with percussion that sounds like the feeling of water droplets or watching it on your hand. The melody on opulence is higher in pitch and the sound to me feels flying high and it provides a feeling of joy and hope. I'm try very hard to help deaf people when I can. A few years ago I worked on a documentary film that was for a community of individuals who were deaf. It was nice for my to gain empathy and to feel like the outsider as everybody around me was fluent in ASL and I only knew how to say "Hi, I am jackie" in sign. I'm trying to focus on music videos as that music is what my audience prefers to most however I enjoy doing the music videos and a lot of my music is remixes of public domain stories and content. I have a disability myself and this is important to me to help other with accessibility. I personally reached out to X about the live streams as I was unable to keep up and I image it was extremely difficult for y'all on the team as well. If you are okay with me asking, what would be helpful for captions or describing music? Is there a person or website you recommend?

Christian (1 like)

Nice work! I loved the simple animation style and the text effects were very clean. I think that there were a few parts that you could have edited differently in order to help your story along. You could have had the music stop when the text "One day the music stopped. The DJs warned everybody of the hurricane hitting Miami" appears. Additionally, I think that having the main obstacle, the boss, being defeated by something external takes away from our characters since of importance in the story. From the stories perspective the main character wouldn't need to exist in order for the obstacle to be removed.

Jacquelin

Thank you for your feedback. I cut out about 4-6 scenes to make it shorter with the scenes it didn't seem organic and either way if you think about it this is really a love story.

Yiqiao (1 like)

What a great idea for pixel animation, but the story is very short.

Jacquelin

Thank you for your feedback.